Things I've Learnt About Motherhood

untitled-3.jpg

I’ve been a mother for nearly eleven years…

And although we can never know all we need to know, I wanted to share some of the things I’ve learnt along the way. Motherhood can seem so daunting, often lonely and creates so much guilt, with us always wanting to get it right. But I've realised that as long as we love and lots of it, that is the most important thing there is.

Love is always enough. If you ever think you don’t have anything else to give, then love will be enough.

Hold your babies, your children, your tweens and your teens. Lean into each other and don’t let go.

Get down on the floor and play. Because even if it’s the last thing that you want to do, your children will remember this, far longer than you.

If you want to co-sleep, demand feed and not put your child down, listen to your heart. You wont ever regret that time spent and will treasure it when it is gone.

Ditto if you want to self soothe, night wean, or put your baby down. Do what helps you in that moment and remember that love is enough.

Get down to our children’s level, so we can look them in the eye. And yes our legs may give way but at least they know we tried.

Children copy far more what we do, than what we say. So if you don’t want them to shout, don’t shout and if you want them to be kind, be kind back.

Let them wash up, tidy up, make, clean and cook. Yes it may be messy and all the rest but you are teaching your young, to look after their nest.

Children don’t want or need, all the things we think they do. They just want you and when all is said and done, you can’t put a price on that.

Let the lego builds, trail the floor and the books pile way up high. Instead lay here together and watch the stars light up the sky.

Apologise when you make mistakes and don’t feel guilty for making them either. Kids need to know that we are human too but please, say sorry if you need to.

Listen to the small stuff and they will tell you the big. Sure you don’t want to hear it again but listen to the thingamajig.

You can be a parent, an advocate and a best friend too, I promise you now, that you don’t have to choose.

Celebrate their individuality in any way you can. Be there for their triumphs and to catch them when they fall.

Speak to your kids how you wish to be spoken. The words we use matter, so think before you speak.

The days we think that we are failing, as the days they will remember as good. Toast for tea and bundled trips to the sea, are the days they will remember the most.

Let them make some decisions and let them make mistakes. We are here to always guide them but trying is what it takes.

Time is the most precious thing we have. Use it wisely and use it well.

Put down your computers, your iPads, your kindles, your phones and pay attention to your family, to the children in your home.

kids aren’t bothered by flash or expensive things. Make houses out of cardboard and brightly coloured wings.

Push them on the swings, until your arms get tired and ache. Have picnics in the park there are memories to make.

Let them be happy, or sad, or silly, or mad, Allow all of the feelings, as none of them are bad.

Tell them that you love them and then tell them again. Show them that you love them and that your love will never end.

Let them get muddy and dirty, with grass and grazed stained knees. Let them climb mountains and hills and all of the big green trees.

Let go of guilt, or at least not let it be so loud. We are learning along with them, don’t let your mind overcrowd.

Play their favourite computer game, or watch their favourite show. Be into what they are into, even if at first you think, Oh No.

Love them for who they are and not who you wish they were. Love them as themselves and watch their confidence soar.

Don’t underestimate a game of cards, or checkers, or throw the ball. Let them win, let them lose, let them make up the rules.

Be silly, be giddy, be playful, roll around on the floor. Make daisy chains and tell bad jokes, the kids will ask for more.

Hold them close but let them go, the most bittersweet moments there are. But love them always and love them well, no matter how near or far.

Tell them stories both yours and theirs, to remember where you all belong. Merge words and worlds together, in a family themed love song.

Above all else mama, remember this, that love can be enough. And if you don’t feel like you have anything else to give, then love will be enough.